Biblical Tips for Dealing with Grief: How a Christian Can Deal with Grief and Loss

This post seeks to address how a Christian can navigate dealing with grief

❤️ If you are dealing with grief at this very moment, I pray that this post will be of help during this difficult time. ❤️

Grief and loss are often associated with the death of a loved one. However, grief can also mean the end of a marriage, friendship, or relationship. It can mean the loss of a pregnancy or the death of a beloved pet. It can also mean the loss of a job, mourning the loss of your country of birth due to fleeing war, or even immigration.

Overall, grief and loss are some of the most challenging things that a person can go through. It can be especially hard for Christians, who often struggle to find God in their grief. They can question why this happened and perhaps why God allowed it.

This blog post will explore some biblical tips for coping with grief and loss. Although I write and reference grief when it comes to losing a loved one, keep in mind that you can apply my tips to any grief and loss you are experiencing.

I will also discuss how finding God in our grief can help us heal and move on. If you are grieving any loss, please know that you are not alone. The Lord is with you, and He will comfort you in your time of need.

What to not say to a grieving person

Before experiencing the loss of my father in 2020, I must admit that I didn’t understand the weight of loss. I had lost my grandfather in 2013, but my grandfather lived to be around 115. He died of old age and in his sleep. So, the loss was somewhat different from losing my father because he (my dad) was diagnosed with End-Stage Renal Disease (ESRD). My father’s heaven homecoming journey was rather difficult and heart-wrenching.

After losing my father, I realized how people could be insensitive or ignorant of loss. I also became empathetic to people who have experienced loss. I started thinking of all the things I said to people who experienced loss before, and I wondered what I could have done better.

The following is what I can tell people looking for advice on comforting someone as far as a loss.

Don’t say:

-We loved him/her but God loved them more.

-I know how you feel.

-It’s time to get over it and move on.

-It was for the best; they are in a better place now.

-It was their time to go.

-At least he/she lived a long life.

-You should be over this by now.

-You will grow and be strengthened from this.

-There is a reason why God took them away.

If you want to offer support but don’t know what to say, try one of these phrases:

-I’m here for you.

-Please let me know if there is anything I can do to help.

-I’m sorry for your loss.

-How are you holding up? (check-in)

People are different, and some of the above things may not be one-size-fits-all. However, the bottom line is- be present and listen to the person! Everyone is different in grief, but I can tell you the present people made the most impact on my journey.

Christian Mourning Period

Christian Mourning Period

Several biblical stories illustrate how people grieved after losing loved ones for extended periods.

Here are some examples:

  • When King David’s infant son died, he fasted and wept for him for days (2 Samuel 12:16-23).
  • Similarly, when the prophet Elijah was taken into heaven, Elisha grieved for him and refused to be consoled (2 Kings 2:13-17).
  • The death of Aaron, the older brother of Moses, was a significant event in the history of Israel. According to Numbers 20:29, the length of mourning lasted for thirty days.

Per the examples provided, there is no finite time for mourning. Yes, there is a mourning period after the death of a loved one, but it varies from person to person! This time is necessary to allow for the healing process to begin.

While there is no set time frame or “one way” for grieving, it is essential to remember that God is with us in our sorrow. He understands our grief and is willing to comfort us in our time of need. The Bible says, “Blessed are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted” (Matthew 5:4). We can find strength and hope in God, even when we feel sad and lonely. As Christians we can find solace in our faith and use biblical principles to help us through this difficult time.

If you are finding it difficult to cope with the death of a loved one, consider attending a Bible study or joining a grief support group. These groups can offer support and guidance as you work through your loss. I was fortunate to have taken a grief class in my master’s program, so I was able to walk through processing my grief during that difficult time.

Questioning God after death loved one

Once a loved one dies, the following questions can come flooding in: “Why did this happen? Why didn’t they get better? What did we do wrong?” These are all valid questions that can be difficult to answer. The Bible does offer some guidance, though. In the book of Job, Job’s friends come to him after he has lost everything. They try to convince him that he must have sinned for God to allow this to happen. But Job doesn’t listen. He continues to question God and demand answers.

Even though we may not always understand why something happens, we can still hold onto our faith and lean on God when filled with doubt and questions. In the book of Psalms, David writes, “even though I walk through the darkest valley, I will fear no evil, for you are with me.” This reminds us that even when we are going through tough times, God is still with us.

So in short, questioning God can be a normal part of grieving. However, if you find it difficult to cope with grief and loss, please don’t hesitate to reach out for help. There are many resources available to you, including counseling and support groups to help you process the grief in a safe environment.

Stages of grief Christian perspective

Here are the five stages of grief as proposed by Swiss-American psychiatrist Kübler-Ross. I list each stage and provide a Christian perspective to them. The stages don’t always go in this order as grief isn’t linear. Remember, there is no template for grief, and there is no right or wrong way to grieve. Grief is a process that is different for everyone.

Denial

It is not uncommon for a grieving person to deny that the loss has occurred. This is especially true if the death was sudden or unexpected. Denial can be a defense mechanism that helps us cope with the pain of loss. However, it is crucial to face reality and eventually grieve.

Anger

It is perfectly normal to feel anger after a loss. We may be angry with God, the person who died, or even ourselves. It is essential to express our anger in healthy ways, such as journaling or talking to a trusted friend or counselor.

Bargaining

During this stage of grief, we may find ourselves bargaining with God. We may say things like, “If only I had done more, my loved one would still be alive.” It is important to remember that we cannot control everything in life and that sometimes bad things happen to good people.

Depression

Depression is a common stage of grief. We may feel hopeless and alone. It is crucial to reach out for help during this time and to lean on our faith.

Acceptance

The final stage of grief is acceptance. This does not mean that we are happy about the loss, but rather that we have come to terms with it and are ready to move on with our lives. We may find new meaning in life and our relationship with God.

Bible sermon to comfort after losing loved ones

The Martha and Lazarus story in the Bible is an excellent example of finding comfort after the death of a loved one. When Martha learns that her brother Lazarus has died, she immediately goes to Jesus for help. Even though Jesus knows he is about to raise Lazarus from the dead, Martha still asks him to come and heal her brother. When Jesus arrives, Martha tells him that Lazarus has been dead for four days. Instead of being angry with her for not believing in him, Jesus comforts her and says, “I am the resurrection and the life. He who believes in me will live, even though he dies; and whoever lives and believes in me will never die” (John 11:25-26).

This story teaches us a few important lessons about finding comfort after the death of a loved one.

  • First, we need to go to Jesus for help. He is the only one who can truly comfort our hearts.
  • Second, even though it may seem like there is no hope, we need to trust that Jesus is in control and that he knows what is best for us.
  • Finally, we need to remember that death is not the end. We will see our loved ones again one day in heaven.

If you are struggling with grief and loss, I encourage you to read the story of Martha and Lazarus. It is an excellent reminder of how much Jesus loves us and how he is always there for us, even in our darkest hours.

Comforting bible verses for death of a loved one

Comforting bible verses for death of a loved one

When someone experiences the death of a loved one, it can be difficult to find hope. However, finding comfort in God’s word is essential during this time.

Here are some Bible verses that may offer encouragement and hope:

Psalm 23:4 Even though I walk through the darkest valley, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me.

Psalm 147:3 He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds.

Psalm 34:18 The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit

2 Corinthians 12:9 My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.

Matthew 5:4 Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted.

Revelation 21:4 He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away

1 Peter 5:7 Cast all your anxiety on Him because He cares for you.

Psalm 46:10 Be still, and know that I am God

John 16:22 So with you: Now is your time of grief, but I will see you again and you will rejoice, and no one will take away your joy.

Psalm 73:26 My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.

Matthew 11:28-30 Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.

Psalm 30:5 Weeping may endure for a night, but joy comes in the morning.

John 14:27 Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.

Romans 8:38-39 For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.

Above all, remember that God loves you and is with you every step of the way. He knows your pain and will help you to heal in His time. Lean on Him for strength and comfort, and allow Him to guide you through this challenging season.

Christian grief resources and coping strategies

When somebody experiences a significant loss in their life, it is easy to become overwhelmed with grief. It is natural to feel like everything is spinning out of control, and there is no hope. However, it is essential to remember that God is with us through all of our trials and that He will never leave us. We may not understand why things happen the way they do, but we can trust in His plan for our lives.

Grief Resources and Coping Strategy Tips:

-Talk to a pastor or counselor.

-Join a grief support group.

-Pray for strength and healing.

-Read comforting Bible passages daily.

– Find an outlet for your emotions (coping strategies), such as journaling or painting can be helpful.

– Christian books can offer comfort and guidance during this difficult time.

Additional Christian Grief Resources: https://www.focusonthefamily.com/resources-grief-loss/

Short prayer for grieving family

Example 1

Heavenly Father, we come to You today with heavy hearts regarding the loss of _____. We are struggling to cope with this pain. Lord, we know that You are aware of our sorrow and that You care for us deeply. We pray for comfort during this time.

Example 2

We thank You for the hope of reunion we have in Christ, and we ask for Your comfort during this time of sadness. Help us to lean on You during this time of difficulty. Give us the strength we need to face each day and give us peace knowing that _____ is in Your loving care. Amen.

And that’s its folks, Biblical Tips for Dealing with Grief

The grief process is often long and challenging, but finding God in its midst can help one cope. I pray that the biblical tips I provided for coping with grief and loss can help you navigate this difficult time in your life.

If you or someone you know is struggling with grief, please reach out for help with the resources provided earlier.

Hugs!

Made of Still Logo

4 thoughts on “Biblical Tips for Dealing with Grief: How a Christian Can Deal with Grief and Loss”

  1. Amen. When I was a young widow with three minor children, one with Autism, people said everything on your Don’t Say list. Thanks for sharing this message.

    Reply
    • Hello Tangie! Thank you so much for sharing your experience. I also want to stop and acknowledge your loss. 🌹 I pray that this post will move people’s hearts to be more kind and gentle! It truly goes a long way. Grief and loss is already difficult as it is ❤️

      Reply
  2. Thank you for putting this together Heather. I think we can all learn and be cautious with words we say in the effort to try and comfort but they might be hurtful.

    Reply

Thanks for visiting my blog! Please leave a comment ❤️

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

%d bloggers like this: